Tired✨

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  • teaboot:

    feral-bookwoom:

    teaboot:

    If I can recommend you do 1 low-effort thing for the love of God it is this:

    Keep 5 cards in your pocket. One will say “yes”, the second will say “no.”

    If you lose your voice, or lose speech, or want to make a dramatic embellishment at the right time, it is an elegant and efficient solution that is right there at hand.

    But what if people question you from there? “Why do you have that card? Why would you do this? How long have you had that in your pocket?” For this, or whatever else they say, the third card: “I don’t have a card for that.”

    “What the fuck,” they ask. They laugh. They are bemused. You bring the energy back down with the fourth card: “I have laryngitis. I’ve lost speech. My throat hurts”. Whatever you expect to occur.

    The joke is over. Rule of threes. Now they are curious. YThey wonder about logistics. “How did you know I would say that? Is everyone so predictable?”

    As a three-part bit, nobody ever sees the fifth card coming.

    “I have powerful wizard magics.”

    Gets them every time

    On it boss!!

    image

    [id: a set of 5 UNO cards upon which has been written, “Yes”, “no”, “I don’t have a card for that”, “can’t talk right now 😢”, and “I have powerful wizard magics 🙂”. End id]

    (via averypotterwhovian)

    • 11 hours ago
    • 26547 notes
    • #lol
    • #genius
  • shyflops:
“worldheritagepostorganization:
“greatcomputerearthquake:
“funnierabbit75:
“ lostspirit101:
“ cleoselene:
“ lord-blongus:
“ scp2008:
“ amuzed1:
“ saito-91:
“ thenamesdiondra:
“ cynosurecosplay:
“ batter-sempai:
“ sueanoi:
“...

    shyflops:

    worldheritagepostorganization:

    greatcomputerearthquake:

    funnierabbit75:

    lostspirit101:

    cleoselene:

    lord-blongus:

    scp2008:

    amuzed1:

    saito-91:

    thenamesdiondra:

    cynosurecosplay:

    batter-sempai:

    sueanoi:

    pardonmewhileipanic:

    bankuei:

    meqabitch:

    theryanproject:

    futureblackpolitician:

    cloacacarnage:

    i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do

    Wtf????

    Smoove with it too 

    This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters. 

    “Pathetic.  You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”

    reminds me of this gif

    image

    Originally posted by wavingtoyesterday

    image

    Baseball players are to be feared

    image

    Originally posted by unbelievable-facts

    Reblogging for the last one

    ^Same for me

    They just kept getting progressively more “woah”

    much woah

    Oh my god this is a lucky universe

    every time this post comes around, my favorite part is the “I know it’s the Mets” qualifier at the beginning lmao like how baseball that this zillion note posts starts with “sorry for putting this hellteam on your dash, bUT”

    Y’all have no idea how hard I was trying not to laugh in class at that poor bird

    They…they just blew up a fucking bird…

    image

    Ball’s dead. Bird’s dead. I’m dead

    World Heritage Post

    Clip from a newspaper. It is a quote from Randy Johnson, Seattle Mariners pitcher. "I don't own a gun, but I keep a bag of baseballs near our bed. If someone breaks in they better be wearing a batting helmet because I'm going to throw at their head."

    personally my favorite thing about Mr. Bird Evaporator is this

    imagine being the poor fool tryna rob this man’s house only to be instantly transported to the same dimension as that bird

    (via averypotterwhovian)

    • 11 hours ago
    • 1365799 notes
    • #baseball
  • coughloop:

    we are all going to be ookay some day i promise

    image

    stingray blast

    (via smallpinkplushie)

    • 11 hours ago
    • 50009 notes
    • #weirdly motivational
  • batfamfucker:
“aurosoulart:
“aurosoulart:
“when your art program’s closing message hits you straight in the heart and makes you stop and contemplate the state of it all
”
because of the huge response to this post, I decided to make a version of the...

    batfamfucker:

    aurosoulart:

    aurosoulart:

    when your art program’s closing message hits you straight in the heart and makes you stop and contemplate the state of it all

    because of the huge response to this post, I decided to make a version of the art that includes the text

    image

    (I’ve also uploaded this version of the design to INPRNT, Society6, and Redbubble)

    This is sickkkkk

    (via youve-doomed-us-all-jerk)

    • 11 hours ago
    • 261563 notes
    • #art
  • bloomsbury:

    image

    a couple of rey designs for the new movie ✨

    • 1 day ago
    • 652 notes
    • #fanart
    • #rey
    • #star wars
    • #rey of jakku
    • #daisy ridley
  • (via sweetbabyrayray)

    • 2 days ago
    • 7317 notes
    • #anyways 🙂
  • anxietyproblem:

    image

    (via sweetbabyrayray)

    • 2 days ago
    • 14577 notes
    • #🥲
    • #real
  • julianbashir:

    image

    (via tumblingoverstars)

    • 3 days ago
    • 9175 notes
    • #tshirt
    • #real hot girl shit
  • machine-factory:

    love this piece by Javier Pérez titled ‘Carroña’. Ten stuffed crows carefully placed on a shattered red chandelier to look as if they were feasting on a dead animal. 

    (via averypotterwhovian)

    • 3 days ago
    • 90528 notes
    • #art
  • homeboygirl:

    when your friend asks if you have any plans like nope just me and the skull lol

    (via fairycosmos)

    • 3 days ago
    • 14143 notes
    • #text post
    • #anyways 🙂
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